Thursday, April 11, 2013

A Small Breasted Blogger Plea [Guest Post by Tatiana]

Today's guest post is by the lovely Tatiana of DrivenbyTatiana. After seeing the recent post on Musings on Bra Blogging, she decided to share her thoughts on what she thinks is needed in the Bra Blogging world.

As per my usual relationship with the internet, I stumbled into lingerie blogging clicking random links that led to one site after another, when I noticed a very peculiar theme: everyone had large breasts.

The few small breasted bloggers I did discover had gone months without writing anything. On top of that, their sites seemed less tended to, social media a ghost town.

I found it difficult to connect with these full bust blogs and their owners - every time they'd post a review of a lingerie brand, I'd wonder if that bra came in a smaller size. I'm much more interested in what it means to grow up small-breasted, to live in a world where people constantly think you're a kid (when I was sixteen, someone said I looked nine).

Because breasts are intimately linked with how we talk about womanhood, an oft heard complaint - in my life and others - is being perceived as child-like (in terms of how your body looks, not the actual energy you're giving off). It encapsulates this feeling that you're not growing, that there's more waiting to do, that you haven't arrived.

As I grew up and attempted to find some solace in my own thin, curve-less body, many of the attempts people made to reconcile their feelings weren't interesting to me. I didn't want to describe myself as fey-like, I don't enjoy sports so being small never helped me, and I still have back pain from poor posture.

There seemed no decent answers to my incessant questionings: how does one come to terms with having small breasts?

My goal isn't to love my body per se; having an entire lifetime of being made fun of because my body wasn't developing has certainly left its mark. So I sought out the help of small breasted bloggers, to read their stories so I could finally put much of emotional past where it belonged - in the past.

But there aren't any small breasted bloggers. Not really.

I scowled, throwing an internal fit, wondering why all the prolific bloggers were well endowed.

Where are the stories of people with bodies like mine? Aren't there any boutiques especially for A cups and smaller? Or is there just the one or two that every body knows? Why aren't more people talking about this? How do I get the conversation going?

So here I am, imploring small breasted bloggers to create more content, more often.

We need more stories for women, so ashamed of how small they are, that they rarely leave the house.

We need more stories for women who seek alternative methods (ie BRAVA, herbal remedies) in an attempt to increase their cup size.

We need stories for women who break down in tears when they go to bra section of a store because you feel inept, like you don't belong.

As both a blogger and someone who is small breasted, I want to see more conversation intersecting the relationships to our bodies, the clothes we wear and what it all means.

So, small breasted [lingerie] bloggers, PLEASE BLOG MORE.

8 comments:

  1. Hm, although I do feel like being small breasted I'm not sure whether I fall into your category.
    But you're right, maybe I too should blog about life as a small busted girl more often. I've got some stuff online already but since I'm very lingerie addicted I end up doing review posts etc more than in depth body posts!

    Just maybe it helps if I say: I'VE BEEN THERE. the hurtful comments. not being perceived as a woman. everything. I feel your pain.
    For me life changed with some personal issues and my love for lingerie. The love for lingerie might be frustrating sometimes, but I found some stores and brands making perfect bras for me, so I can indulge in happy luxury retail therapy.

    Another thing that really helped (and I really should do a blog post on THAT topic thanks for the reminder) is that I decided going braless. A lot. I mean, I'm small busted anyway, with or without bra. And sometimes I just don't feel like wearing a bra. I don a pair of jeans, a nice shirt, my favourite perfume and an aura of contempt. It took me a long time to be there, but sometimes this is just what I need.

    PS: if you want to talk about brands and bras for smaller busts you're always welcome to message me!

    xoxo denocte

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    1. Thanks for commenting Denocte!! :D

      "I don a pair of jeans, a nice shirt, my favourite perfume and an aura of contempt"

      Haha. That's hilarious and awesome. I used to go braless a lot in high school, but stopped because I hated the way it looked. I have a general dislike for having small breasts - there aren't any perks useful to me and my personality. So I thought having more small breasted lingerie bloggers would help give a broaded perspective.

      I can't wait for us to chat via Skype .

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  2. Even though I fall on the larger busted side, I really enjoy reading the smaller-busted bloggers because it helps me to appreciate a perspective outside my own. There truly is a need for a greater discussion in this size range, and I hope other women out there create blogs and start actively expressing themselves and enriching the community. Great post!

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    1. Thanks for commenting! And thanks for the compliment about my post! :D

      Yes. A lot of lingerie bloggers are more endowed so it feels like I'm invisible if an aspect of my body isn't heavily represented in the community. I hope more small breasted bloggers will see this and decide to blog more!

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  3. AMEN SISTER. I'm a 36A, which apparently is a crazy-big band for an A (even when I was a skinny high schooler I was a 36, so apparently I just have big ribs?). If one more person says in my presence that it's so much haaaaaaaaarder for larger-breasted women to find bras that fit and how the bra industry is geared for smaller women she's going to get a steel-toe Redwing boot up her...

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    1. Haha!!

      Exactly!! There's a huge focus on large breasts + lingerie (and everything else) because it's such a preferred beauty standard - almost across the board. But if no one is talking about your body and how you can dress our body, then that makes it difficult to clothe it or create a relationship with it.

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  4. Great post! I have always been on the too-big side of the story, place that comes with a lot of body image issues. I find your post so interesting, because it helps see things from a different perspective. To be very honest, I haven't thought that having small boobies would have any reason to make one insecure. I mean...you can wear backless or strapless evening dresses, you can go braless under a tank top, you can actually wear a tank top! :) But it saddens me to hear that even having a body type that I have always thought nice and problem-free comes with its own set of insecurities and hurtful comments from others.

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  5. In response to this post I'd decided to start my own small breasted blogger blog: http://petiteplentiful.blogspot.nl/

    Hopefully it'll help with the lack of small bust bloggers!

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